Friday, May 9, 2014

Capital Games (2013) gay movie review

Rating: 4/10

Quick & Nasty: Based on a popular novel, ex-cop and advertising maverick meets new colleague from over the pond. They're both straight at first, then not really, then they drive off into the sunset (hurrah for happy endings). Lots of angsty acting, weird cuts and terrible dialogue will probably erode much of the enjoyment you may derive from watching the beautiful men frolic onscreen. Yes, but do watch this for the cute men - I particularly like the gbf (gay best friend), Shane Keough, who apparently has been in one of 'em 'Real Housewives' franchises and is just sensational to look at. And I do confess to liking this one scene involving handcuffs (go figure)... but really, if you want to watch something with cops in it, Free Fall is still your best bet.

That this movie achieved an IMDB rating close to '6' is testament to the popularity of its writer, G A Hauser. My only other conclusion that I can draw from that is that a lot of her readers could do with a solid dose of gay cinema because this ain't worth the rating 6 (5.9, when I last checked).

The actors were beautiful - so thumbs up for the casting choices  - but it goes quite a ways downhill after the starting scene where the dishy Eric Presnell is jogging in LA. Some of the settings were incredible - but I think the movie was really let down by the filming. There is a distinct lack of ability in whoever had the ultimate say in how the final product looked. And that's a real pity. I've sat through many a gay movie with half-baked storylines and grating dialogue, and still walked out with an appreciation of the film because of how beautiful the scenes were. But this was not one of them.

So the protagonist's an ex-cop, and the team's tried to fill in his backstory with these really gnarly flashbacks which are terribly filmed and (here's my main gripe) have one of the most excruciating dialogues I've had to sit through in a while. I understand that the flashbacks draw on another novel of G A Hauser's - and will help tie in the story of his relationship with his own dad, but there was just too little development to bring it all together in a cohesive fashion. And as much as I enjoyed both men suddenly launching themselves into each other's faces in desert - the pacing was so poor that it was more like being slapped in the face with a wet trout.

The title of the movie may trigger word associations with 'Hunger Games' and 'Ender's Games' (Google seems to think this), but don't hold your breath for any action scenes - even if you're hoping for an American Psycho-esque plot to shake up the entirely boring ad agency (now that's a killer oxymoron). If you're after something like that... check out the Argentinian movie, Solo.